Who hid ETSY from me?

I've fallen in love with Etsy, the site where true cottage industries and business-minded craftsters flourish.

There's a million things on sale - everything hand made by someone who's creative or crazy, mostly both it seems.

I've perused handmade bath products, drooling all the while becoz everything seems to be food based. I've looked up all sorts of silly kitsch things that I've dreamed up while sitting here in the 'cold room' of my house.

All bundled up in an old Ralph Lauren blankie (wierd trivia bit there. I wonder how my family has one of these) I've enjoyed every one of my minutes on the site.

Sadly enough, I am again confronted with the knowledge that I'm a lazy little imp and should make most of these things myself. If only for myself and not for any kind of sale.

I love the site though, all soothing colors and not-so-good search tools. I love it becoz it reminds me of how I chanced upon my favourite ring, now immortalized in gold, at the art gallery markets when I was 15. A journey of discovery indeed. And one in which I come to my usual conclusion

- I am neither skilled nor creative enough.

Go forth with a flourish, folks.

Sprinkler

When I arrived home today I saw my neighbour's ute in his driveway for the second day in a row.

My neighbour's name is Charlie and he has an accent like mine. A middle-aged Caucasian, I like him for his quiet greetings and lack of intrusive questions. IMHO, he's the best kind of neighbour to have - friendly and yet barely there.

Another segeway into evening on the Lye driveway.

I waved to him as usual and sang out "Hi Charlie."

And as he greeted me, it occured to me that he probably did have a lawnmower... which I promptly inquired about.

Of course, halfway through my question, I realized that I have no, none, zero interest in mowing my own lawn. WTF. Why the hell did I ask? ...Oh yeah, I remember now - becoz mowing it myself seemed less troublesome than organizing someone to mow it for me....

Turns out, he has a shit-ass mower but his other, middle-aged ute owning friend (who I see sometimes) has a better one and probably wouldn't mind mowing my pathetic patch-o-grass for a minimal fee. Or patch-o-tall weeds, as it really is now.

Ah hah.

Then I thought," hey, he might know the secret behind the reticulation."

And after some fiddling, he did.

Turns out tap needed to be on AND sprinkler knob needed to be on simultanously. Hot damn. The new-fangled shit they'll come up with these days. The courtyard sprinkler system has eluded me for months. I'd been running into my courtyard armed with a bucket (filled at the kitchen tap no less) since moving in here. A foolhardy venture each time as it involved an ungainly dance across my newly laid carpet.

Hmm.

And for one moment there, I kinda wished that I did have neighbours of the old skool variety.

It was nice knowing that I liked the folks next door. Nicer still knowing they didn't mind me.

Kalmykia

Did everyone else know this country existed?

http://kalm.ru/en/

An entire Buddist nation within the Russian Federation? A nation populated by Kalmyks who seem... very Asian in appearence? A geek-filled place that has, at its head, a fellow who is president of the World Chess Federation?

http://www.newtimes.ru/eng/detail.asp?art_id=615 What an excellent picture. No ego evident at all. (and it sounds like he's embracing autocracy as only an Asian and, dare I say it, a product of socialism can.)

I think I've just found my next holiday destination, folks. A place that combines my love of dodgy places, Russian language and Buddhism.

I wonder how I'll arrange this holiday... But wait, I'm sure this year's chess championships in the capital Elista have put the place on the damn map by now.

2

1.) My first ever fruit/herb/edible plant has produced a large green lump. I was looking at it the other night with disdain when I realized that it's a nascent strawberry. In spite of myself, I was charmed and have been staring out at the plant every day since.

I'm enchanted by the idea that this could occur. That it's true - plants produce fruit. And my plants will produce fruit even though I care for them but grudgingly. I've wondered abt that strawberry since .... should I eat it when ripe? Would that be a cruel thing to do? As if separating and devouring the plant's young?

Poor plant.


2.) I came to the realization yesterday that Perth is finally getting more African immigrants.
There weren't too many Asians when I arrived (but now the proverbial cup runneth over) and there were no Africans. But now, I see a few walking the streets, working in stores and there's even a few doctors at my hospital.

This realization made me smile.

Finally.

"A building gets torched. All that is left is ashes. I used to think that it is true about everything - family, friends, feelings - but now I know that sometimes if love proves real, and two people are meant to be together, nothing can keep them apart...
If the people we love are taken from us, the way they live on is to never stop loving them.Buildings burn, people die, but real love is forever."-Sarah, The Crow.

I wish I could change who I was and how I react.

I wish I could be something other than what I am. There's no better or worse, just other.

Other than me.

You're right: if paying money makes me believe statements of the bleeding obvious, than it's probably money well-spent.

Odd Moments

I finally had my end-of-term review done yesterday by my last consultant. It's funny becoz I cannot imagine any consultant considering themselves friends with the interns but mine does. And I s'pose he actually is.

He wrote on my form that I had a "great work ethic" which was hilarious becoz who'd have thought there'd come a day when I was hardworking. He also wrote (having cleared it with me first), that I was hyper-critical of myself and that this was an area for improvement. And when I tried to laugh it off he gave me that sad look he always does and was very silent.

It was a good experience. Becoz even though the assessments are arbitrary and everyone seems to be told they're excellent, he'd actually thought abt my performance and was honest.

I told him last term that I was planning on getting help for my self-esteem.

I think after several weeks of just the two of us running the team, we're much closer and more comfortable that otherwise expected. I got to play registrar and in return, my boss had faith and trust in my psychiatric skills. What a pity I could not turn them inward to help myself.

My former boss said that perhaps I'd hated medical school becoz in it I was nothing and no one of consequence. And that after growing up with my parents, being someone was pivotal to me and my sense of self-worth.

I was floored becoz that is absolutely it. It had never even occured to me. I had always considered my folks the most silly, spastic bunch of people ever. But I guess, there's much they've achieved and their standards have been relentless. And now mine are even more so.

Walking back to my car, I thought also of what my psychologist said on Monday and I am astounded.

There's so much abt my life and myself it seems I do not know. I am so riddled with bias that I've failed to see even the most obvious things. Even the things that mean the world to me. Even the things I want to see.

So where do I go from here?

*splutter*

Garrrrrr.

I had a moment last night with two of my closest friends when I realized that perhaps, one of my bosses had made a pass at me.

I was relating a work story and then, blam (a la the Batman Series), it hit me. Goddamn it, I'm a fool.

Silly Vicki had just thought everyone was being nice and friendly.

It was an interesting experience though. It made me realize, albeit a little more suddenly than I had initally hoped, that I am adult now. A real, working adult - ripe for workplace sexual harassment.

My resident has commented that perhaps my "keen-ness" gave the boss the wrong impression. ... I cannot help but think he has a point... And so he has been nominated as my "keen-o-meter" to keep me from such faux pas in future.

I'm gonna miss working with him. I feel as if he's one of the very few new friends I've made all year. And yeah, I know that becoz of all our spare, Osborne Park-style downtime, we've become closer than we would have otherwise but it's still nice. And I realize that when the term ends, he'll go back to his world of nice Christian-Chink-doctors and I'll return to mine of drunking former UMATers. He will remain a good guy, however, and he will be missed.

In other news, the saga of The House is finally drawing to a close.

I have made the bookings and the house will be 100% ready for human habitation (yes, what have I been doing here) in slightly less than a month. Cable TV, fully refurbished kitchen, the whole freaking works.

Tah dah.

...Accordingly, I have made the ultimate commitment to a house-warming. And indeed, there have even been enthusiastic RSVPs - better still.

And so even though I hate to think of dirt being trekked anywhere near my home, I'm excited and a little scared.

Finally, I have decided that today marks the end of my ridiculous, over-enthusiastic, misinformed, misguided over-working. If the one thing I want is true love and if all i do is hide from life, then truly, never the twain shall meet.

So here's to the end of over-working. Here's to taking a chance on the one thing that I'm sure I want when I'm 65. Becoz you can't control everything and that's how true love is to be found.

Becoz somewhere in my subconscious, lurks the girl who asked a stranger to marry her simply becoz they had a shared vision of love everlasting. And even if that was truly a fiasco, I wish I could find that girl once more.

All for love, my dears, all for love.

[for] he that made this this knows all the cost, for he gave all his heart and lost.

Movement Most Mystifying

I have capitulated and moved somewhere where the desire, however misguided, to have photos on my blog is not met with demand for money.
And so folks, I have come here following L-S's footsteps.

My old livejournal will continue to exist till the LiveJournal gods deem otherwise.

The old link - which also contains a link to another site (yeah, fuck yeah, I'm filling the Net with crap as I do my own home) with photo 'albums' - probably still has some value. If only to stand as searing, pitiful testament to my state of mind....

And the photos? they remain, although all new ones will be posted here.

*look right for the links ------>